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< i really, really mean it. | posted at 7:11 pm on November 25, 2005 > So since my last entry, Andrew's dad has contacted him and they are having dinner tomorrow and he is showing his dad his workplace (his own business) and his house, and catching up. After three years.Wednesday night was the awards and I got as drunk as I was meant to, but not as drunk as last year (thank god). Meaning I didn't throw up a million times and I didn't fall asleep in the toilets and I didn't almost get kicked out of the afterparty (and last year the only reason I didn't was because I had about three people pull weight for me and say "Do you know who we are? We put this fucking event on!"). However, my sister did. So yes, she got kicked out of the afterparty venue, and I had to pile her into a taxi to get her home. Sigh. Lots of surprises in the show and it went off like a dream. Perfect timing, short acceptance speeches and laughs when there were meant to be laughs. I left early, though, because I was so tired and my poor A didn't know many people there. Not sure what I want to do next year. My boss's brother, who is one of the most lovely people in the world, comes back to work on the awards each year (but didn't last year). So it's been two years since I've seen him and he said he didn't expect me to still be around. And all these people I saw on Wednesday night told me they would have thought I would have moved on by now. And I reply that yes, I thought I would have moved on by now too - but sadly I hadn't. I want to grow more and I'm not sure if I am. I guess I've just got to push myself harder over the summer. I have been attending summer school classes for illustration which has been great - just mucking about with ink and paint and pencil for full days, and doing little assignments that are due. It's pretty intensive as I work every other day I'm not there, so as soon as that's over I am going to really concentrate on getting bigger. Growing. Practising piano, etc. Sigh. I know, I've said this before and nothing's come of it. Stupid me. But this time I really, really mean it. those last five |