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< i think i've got you on my mind | posted at 8:18 pm on July 08, 2003 > sometimes i walk out of work feeling good, most of the time i feel as if i've embarrassed myself thoroughly that particular day and i come into work hoping to make it better - and each day is a clean slate.i bought vulture street today. it is damn good. i feel unfulfilled, unsatisfied. am looking for some sort of perhaps creative outlet to interest me. or alcohol. that would be good. looking for another opportunity to get very, very drunk. i don't know why. i'm thinking a lot of odd things nowadays, but i don't know why. i have been eating a lot of tim tams at work. even more than usual. the thing is, i think old acquaintance (judging from conversation that night) just has a huge holden caulfield complex, by complex i mean he wants to be him, tries hard, and just isn't. therefore ends up a complete and total bastard which means i'd like to jam a broomstick handle up his arse and see what he thinks of igby then. alternatively he's just an immaculate judge of character and knows that i go for the 'starving artist' type, or even the holden caulfield type (but not the ones with the complex, the ones that are actually HC, however, i don't know if there's really any difference and that i'd be thinking that there was a difference if this had all turned out differently - too much use of variations on the word different there as well as oververbosity and overanalysis), anyway, knew that i was that type of girl (also, read: self-destructive in that manner) and reinvented himself to fool me that way. he is quite bright. though that scenario's a little far-fetched. must stop thinking about it. it's all shot to hell, the entire thing. i'm believing that not only this, but my entire love life as well... this is great. it sounds so very cliche but i did believe that he was different... i guess they just aren't. urgh. i sound so... how do i say it? hell hath no fury like a woman scorned?-esque! oh, beverly hills the reunion - must be off! i still remember the great brenda/kelly dylan fight... ahh, good times. oh! and donna and her obsessive fight to protect her virginity! what a great, great tv show. those last five |