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< quelqu'un m'a dit | posted at 11:08 pm on November 02, 2005 > i was so angry at work today, just in such a bad mood. My back problem is so severe now that I can't walk without limping, and walking downstairs? Filled with pain. People keep telling me to go see someone about it and I keep promising them I will, I even have an osteopath's number who helped me immensely last time, but I haven't called it yet. I'm not quite sure why. Anyway.So couple this with period pain and you literally have a bumbling, stumbling, limping Sarah in much pain. Much, much pain. So when Ross decides he wants to snap at me all day? Not nice. So when I ask why he is snapping at me and get snapping back, and suddenly everyone thinks we're having an argument (which bothers me because I don't have arguments in public spaces), I get annoyed, especially when I ask politely, 'No, really, is anything wrong?' and he replies 'Noogs are you fucking yelling at me again?' (or something along those lines) it really pisses me off, as I didn't even yell in the first place. Then he tells me he's been doing it all day to just play with my mind. Ok, that is not nice. So that's what I told him. Immature. Useless. And mean. then he says 'Now you're lecturing me?' so I say 'Not lecturing you, but you could hurt someone by doing that. And the next time you do act like something is up your butt, I may not believe you, I might ignore it. That's all.' So I got an apology out of him and he really was sorry, and I got over it pretty quickly but it was just a useless thing to do. Why would you do that? Whatever. I really need to find somewhere to live. My sister and I are determined to find the place this weekend. Honestly, I just need to get out here. I can't keep lying to my parents, telling them I'm staying at my old place ('yes, yes, I moved out, but she left me a key and the place is empty so I'm still allowed to sleep there' - what bullshit!), it makes me feel guilty and dirty and wrong. And my mother said to me today that I pained her. Yes, that's right 'pained'. Why? 'Because you are always hanging out with A, you need to keep your self respect don't you! You're not at his beck and call are you?' It's these old fashioned values again, my folks still abide by them. The idea that I might be staying over at a boyfriend's house horrifies them. And I think it makes them feel guilty. So I feel guilty, they feel guilty, we all feel guilty (Andrew feels guilty too) ... solution? I get out of here, they don't know where I'm sleeping. Bondi here I come! I heart summer. I hate the new anti-terror laws, the ner industrial relations reforms, the cross city tunnel and various other governmental debacles. Just wanted to say that. The next few weeks are going to be so busy for me. I'm planning on doing summer school to knock over another subject which will be a pretty full on couple of weeks but worth it for the sole focus of my final project next semester. And there's deadline and the awards... (watch them on TV, I'll tell you when if you email me - gertiechicken AT hotmail DOT com - and at one point you'll get to see/hear me shushing someone in a movie cinema. Cameo Sarah. Lots of fun). Right. O. Then. those last five |