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< landslide | posted at 7:52 pm on May 08, 2005 > well i thought it might be time to do a little update. i'm at home in the west, because today was mother's day. it is also incidentally the first day of the vietnamese lunar year, and the general tradition is that mum eats vegetarian. it's this thing about how my grandfather died end of 03 blah blah old traditions et cetera. and my sister decides that wouldn't it be nice for us all to eat vegetarian with her too because it was mother's day. so today i ate vegetarian.i also slept a lot. napping is such fun. i watched crash in the cinemas today and dogville at home yesterday. both very interesting films, i highly recommend them. my sister graduates tomorrow and my entire extended family seems to be attending. and when i say extended family, i mean it is huuuge. and she only gets two tickets to the actual thing, the rest of us are stuck outside waiting to congratulate her, take naff photos and go to one huge mumma of a lunch. then i actually have class, and an assignment to do, and am helping a friend out on a shoot tomorrow night. and then i'll have to return to work, which i really don't want to think about, because i'm SO pissed off at work right now. it was deadline last week and my inconsiderate editor went to dinner with his girlfriend (on work cash, mind you) in the middle of deadline night, leaving me at around 9pm with no copy to design, effectively stealing my sleep and free time. so i told him that because i had nothing to design, i was going home. he was incredulous, and tried to think of excuses for me to stay. i said no, i'm not going to hang around waiting for you to write. needless to say the friday following (which is the day we are meant to actually send the fucker) was full of distant, businesslike politeness which is not like us at all. and i had to rush out of there to go to my friend's fashion show in fashion week, and because I HATE MY WORK AND THEY ARE ALL INCONSIDERATE FUCKFACES, i missed the show by about one second. SERIOUSLY. i know. it's ridiculous. they can all die and go to hell. so i'm glad i'm not going to be there till tuesday. fuck them all. anyway, on other notes. hmm. i am having some straaange dreams lately. yesterday i dreamt that andrew told me his real name as maneck wank - to which i replied, 'your name was wank? didn't you get teased at school for that?' - and that he used to be a banker and decided it wasn't for him, and then broke up with me for some reason (but i wasn't upset?) and blah blah. and two nights ago i had a dream that (please don't cringe, ok, you're going to cringe anyway so i'll just say it straight) there was meat coming out of my.. thing. my snatch, as you might call it. I KNOW. YUCK. also i asked nick if he was seeing someone else. because he asked me a few weeks ago and i thought i might just ask out of curiosity. i knew he was having a few casual one-night-stands or whatever, so i just wanted to, i don't know, find out stuff. he said he was. hmm. did i ever mention i got a message from him at 2.40am a few weeks ago saying 'oi mate where are you? can't find that fucking swedish bird. bitch.' it obviously wasn't meant for me. weird. it's strange. who he seems now doesn't seem at all like the person i was with. i didn't think the nick i was with would ever have one-night-stands. he was so sensitive and sentimental. it's strange. but i guess people change. and while it makes me feel a little funny inside, i have no right to feel that way because it was me who broke up with him, for someone else, and i was the one who cheated on him. and he still doesn't hate me. and he still loved me for months afterwards. i don't know what my point is. the point is i'm not allowed to be all weird about it. and i'm mostly not. just four more sleeps, and andrew returns. dammit. i was meant to be really productive in these days where i wasn't distracted by him. you know, get a head start on assignments, get everything in order, clean my room etc. the things you put off doing because you'd rather spend your rare spare time with the other. i haven't done that. i've just slept a lot. dammit. those last five |